Not ready for male attention

How does it feel to get picked up by a guy, really?
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Initial feeling: Awkward… Shy… Weird…
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Followed by: Uncertain of what to do… Afraid of what he might do…
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Proceed to: Search for backup. When fail, run and hide as fast as possible.
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When already in a secure location: Erm… it feels kind of flattering, actually.

Well, *gurgle* I don’t have any recollection of EVER garnering any male attention. *ponder ponder* Well maybe, I’ve not been getting any every since I’ve had a steady boyfriend :P So yeah, *sigh…* now I’m single… and erm… available. And now suddenly...

Situation 1: Cable car line up with Jess and Christine in Genting
Unexpectedly, there were lots of travelers from Middle Eastern countries that weekend. The lines were really, really long (about 3 times of TGV cinema ticket line up in 1 Utama) forming a snake-like lineup. When we were in line, there was this ‘uncle’ who flashed me a smile and said, *“Ni hao mha?”. I thought he was kind of nice for trying to speak Mandarin and all, so I replied with a, “Hao…” I kept to that opinion until ‘snake formation lineup’ met in the middle again and he flashed me another smile with another, “Ni hao mha?” I was like, “Huh?”

When it happened for the THIRD times… *groan* It certainly didn’t help with Christine and Jess was snickering along going, “Hahahaha… the line’s still a long way to go-leh…” and “Ahhh… Middle Eastern guys like tall, fair girls wan” *shakes head* After that, I just kind of stared into space whenever we met in the middle :P

Uncle very scary :(

Situation 2: Dinner at TB Corner. Damansara Perdana
Guy: Are you Jane?
Me : Err…no. *maybe he mistook ‘Juan’ with ‘Jane’?*
Guy: Oh, sorry… I thought we met in Australia. Were you ever in Australia?
Me : Uhh… yes. I was studying there *Do I know this guy?*
Guy: Ahh… we met in Sydney, remember?
Me : Err… I was in Melbourne.
Guy: I’m a graphic designer *insert small talk* So, what do you do?
Me : mumble…mumble..
Guy: So, do you have a business card with you?
Me : Err… no. *what would a graphic designer want to do with an IT consultant?*
Guy: Oh, a mobile number’s fine… I’d like to give you a call…

Suddenly, the light bulb flicked on *duh-h... after such a long conversation, how stupid can one get?* and I frantically tried to call Chun How and Kelvin for backup. *sigh…* Chun How was in Penang and Kelvin had already gone back to Cheras. I don’t think my dinner digested very well… *burp*

Guy also very scary :( And to think this happened when I was in T-shirt, shorts, and without an ounce of make-up *shakes head*.

For now, I think I’ll stop at 2 examples *sigh…*. These stuff is so foreign and scares the living light bulbs out of me. I don’t get it. Why’s the attentions starting now? Whatever happened during the past 7 years? Well for starters, I look and feel and same (am aging, but surely that’s a minus point? :P). Do I suddenly have some neon-sign above head going, “AVAILABLE”? *scratch head* Whilst it’s kind of flattering and all, but a huge part of me would rather things return to normal. Normal… as in… being securely attached whilst having only to focus on things of God and things at work - in an air-headed, easy, sort of way.

Yeah… I really do feel things are kind of spinning out of control at the moment… Trying to adjust at work; between training in RHB, support at Alam Flora, internal projects at Phileo. Trying to adjust in church; new leadership, new cell group, maintaining relationships with my old cell group. Trying to adjust at home; *think I’ll keep this personal*. Trying to adjust to single-hood; there’s these pangs of loneliness especially on days when I’m down with some kind of illness and need a good bear hug. Sigh, I think I want to move back in with mum and dad. But then, it’s a toss between ‘loss of freedom’ and ‘gain of tender loving care’ :P

Juan screams, “STOP SPINNING, WORLD!!!!!!!” please… *sob sob*

And then, there’s that scary guy colleague at the office who…

:P